I am torn.
My stepmother is turning 60, and my sister is throwing her a surprise party on a Saturday night. They live two hours away from us.
a) not go
b) try to spend Shabbat in central NJ; be late to the party (post surprise), but make an appearance
c) try to arrange to spend Shabbat 20 minutes from their house and be there for the denouement (our friends from this community now have a view of the Kinneret from their house, so we’re not going to be crashing there–our option might be a B&B with takeout food or synagogue hospitality)
Other important details:
a) my parents’ house isn’t that big, so it’s unclear where everyone would sleep on Saturday night (my aunt and uncle will also be around)
b) kosher provisions in said house: not so much (I can haz Trader Joe’s?)
c) weather in mid-January: always a toss-up
d) my kids would be the only people under 25 at the party…around their bedtime
Further information that’s come to light in the past few days:
a) my stepmother told my dad and sister that she did not want a party
b) my sister ignored this tidbit and then scheduled the party for a weekend my father is on call (the schedule is drafted a year in advance and cannot be changed)
c) my sister invited 55 people and is still unsure how she is feeding them (and thinks that the two hours my aunt will have my stepmother out of the house would be enough to throw together hors d’oeurves and drinks for that many); my dad is, understandably, teed off and not terribly willing to help my sister get a clue (not that she’d listen)
So…what to do? Too much effort for too much potential mayhem?